Adult Children of Alcoholics--We Don't Need Psychiatrists--We Need the Dalai Lama

Just for the fun of it, while sipping my coffee this morning, I opened up my step daughters college psychology book and began to sift through it. Low and behold, and I am not kidding my hands bring me to a page with the Dalai Lama's picture on it...page 223.

Interests peeked--I began reading. In essence the New York Times wrote a column (Gyatso 2003) describing mindful meditation and its relation to brain biology. In 2005 the Dalai Lama attended the annual meeting of the Society of Neuroscience, where he charmed and captivated an audience of 14,000 neuroscientists, as he explained how practicing mindfulness changes brain chemistry.

We wounded children have plenty to complain about since our pasts have effected the way we see self--and as a result have effected our brain chemistry--but the problem so many of us now have is--we don't know what to do once we finally find the courage to admit we have been wounded at all, and we are stuck with brains that do not secrete enough serotonins and alike.

"What now," I hear so many of my coaching clients asking. "Ok so now I know I have been wounded by my alcoholic parents, partners, children or grandparents-- and now I know my brain is not the sole problem--the way I have been taught to process information is--and now I know that my brain has been hijacked and as a result does not secrete enough 'happy chemicals'--which only amplifies my problems--so now what?"

Many of my clients seek me out because their initial attempts at modern psychotherapy have failed. Talk therapy certainly has its benefits, but without practical tools that will sustain an individuals day to day thoughts--the undertow that is dysfunctional childhood programming sadly usually wins out in the long run.

One practical, FREE thing those of us who seek true emotional freedom from our pasts can do is practice mindfulness. Mindful meditation is not about religion--dogma--or rhetoric. It is a deliberate practicing of stilling the mind.

When I first began meditating, it felt like my thoughts were leaves and they were being tossed around by a huge fan. Somewhere I was conscious of the chaos that was taking place on the playing ground of my mind. It was not easy to learn to allow the leaves of my mind to fall to the ground.

Mindful meditation, like any new journey--takes time. But if you never give up--it gets easier and easier to still your thoughts.

Stilling thoughts helps our brains secrete proper neuro-chemicals which helps our bodies feel more at ease--and so we are able to deal with stressors in a more productive way.

In addition, a calmed mind is less apt to gravitate towards external negatives whether they be conversations, news stories, people, magazines, or movies. Calm minds generally seek out others who are on the same wave length...and carry with them the same peaceful emotional vibration.

While I do believe that modern psychiatry has its benefits--to some individuals who may sadly be on the extreme ends of the psychological spectrum--like schizophrenia, mania, BPD and alike--I believe far more many of us would benefit from regular visits from the Dalai Lama or others like him.

Healing your soul--with your mind--is the way to go.

Namaste...

You are loved...