childhood emotional neglect

Many adults suffer from low self esteem. In spite of how successful we may seem, far too often many of us feel like we are dying inside. Our outer worlds may seem perfect but below the surface we are struggling to keep up the facade.

As odd as it was to be diagnosed with a dis-ease I did not understand, it was just as exciting to discover there was actually a name for what I had. What I had was a people pleasing disorder that prevented me from being able to honor or even connect to my self. Codependency, as it turns out is the product of emotional childhood neglect. Although even the most well meaning parents can create codependent children, the main cause of codependency is childhood emotional trauma. Codependency begins to get rooted into a child's psyche when they experience attachment traumas and grow up feeling emotionally, and psychologically invisible to those they love. When children are not mirrored back a positive sense of self, they are denied the safety of familial bonds that allow them to feel wanted, needed, loved and like they belong to those they love. When these crucial bonds to others are corrupted or denied, the brains of children go into survival mode. Many children sadly are never able to move out of operating in survival mode, and instead get stuck in a state of fight or flight mode.